This post is dedicated to Emily, who requested it several times.

From GMU:

(terrorism) “It’s not in the middle of the ocean somewhere!”

Matt (DiNardo): “Provoke-tion.”

Matt: “Look at Nazi Germany–THAT’S imperialism.”

Matt’s Semi’s Opponant: “No one has an extra right to life.”

^: “…which tells us don’t worry; be happy.”

Emily: “We’re got cockroaches; we will die of nuclear bombs.”

Emily on nukes: “It strikes fear in the hearts of man.”

Also: Patrick and Neal hit each other in semi’s, and apparently, some funny stuff was said (I wasn’t there). Bonus points were awarded for saying “Princess Anne” so it made sense. Patrick quoted Steven Hong of Princess Anne University, and Neal refered to Steven as a pot-smoking, perm-getting Korean, or something to that effect. Yeah.

Today’s TDL:

Turpin: “The assassination of JFK worked, but that does not make it just.”

Emily, on the UN being a gang: “When was the last time you saw the Bloods and the Crips with some flowers saying ‘Let’s all be friends’?”

Emily on other weapons: “…a molecular diffusion raygun…”

That Tallwood kid (Brandon? Brian?), quoting a source: “…Ashton Kutcher.” *odd look* “Ashton Carter.”

Turpin’s Opponant: “His argument was not legible.”

Turpin asks for his definition of risk management.
Opponant: “It’s the management of risks that the United States has to…”
Turpin: “So risk management is the management of risks?”
Opponant: “I did not say that.”

Opponant: “Saddam Hussein violated his citizens.”
Emily’s comment: “Sexually?”

Also, QotMonth? is courtesy of that kid.

The last, like, month basically:

Shirui: “On the beach, there were these balloons. But they were actually condoms.”

Walck, on PMS: “Men have it too. They have it every day.”

Nick (to PK in the middle of class): “I have a bump right here and it’s kind of sore. You don’t think I have lymphoma, do you?”

PK, on a technological war and Vietnam: “Who had more toys than us?”
Alannah: “Mattel?”

Camper: “We’re going to have a lottery!”
Brinn: “Are we going to stone the winner?”
[No, they get to pick their poems to study first]
Chris: “Can you stone me to death instead?”

Ashley: “Quothe the raven–CAW CAW!”

Cosimano: “…y su profesión… es un arte muy interesante.” [And his profession is a very interesting art.]
Rosalie: “Prositución.” [Prositution]
Brinn: “No está un arte…” *beat* “Pues…” [That’s no an art. Well…]
Rosalie: “Pues. Pretty Woman.” [Well. Pretty Woman.]

“Rock, Paper, Scissors, shoot!”
Siarra: “GOD!”

Thurman: “Who’s the champion of universal healthcare?”
Matt and Brinn: “Canada!”

Ashley: “Cat-ions. Not cay-shuns. They live in New Orleans except not anymore cause they drowned.”

Thurman: “Sometimes there’s just one line at the bottom. What’s the cure for this?”
Ashley: “Paxil.”

Thurman on a puzzle thing: “It would be something that would lead to teen suicide, and I didn’t want a part of that.”

(identify “a fat blonde girl” in the novel Mill on the Floss)
Brinn: “Where was that in the book?”
Ashley: “It was in the epilouge. About Nick Kirby.”

(my math teacher left to take an administrative position)
Someone in the class: “At least we’ll know she’s in a better place.”
Someone else: “…She’s not dying.”

Walck: “Why did she have 17 kids? Because God wanted her to.”
Kristin: “God doesn’t want overcrowding.”

Someone in ToK: “They look at George Bush and they see a he.”
Sarah: “Actually, looking at Hillary Clinton, they might think she’s a man.”

Smith on Condi: “I would love to meet her. Even if she is a Republican, I would love to meet her.”

Collin: “Why do you think [muggers and such] target women and old people? They don’t usually have guns. And they’re really slow.”
Class: *uproar*
Collin: “The old people.”

Melissa: “I regulate who goes in and out of the room.”
Ashley: “Like a phospholipid bilayer!”

David on gun control: “Are we supposed to have God come down to say ‘Yep, he’s good for a gun, it’s chill.'”

Cosimano on the subjunctive: “I’m going to watch TV when I get home–I don’t know when that will be or even if it will happen; maybe I’ll get hit by a bus and get killed.”

Melissa: “Ugh, I look horrible [in this picture]. But my breasts looks great.”

From a very long time ago:

(a very big piece of ice is in my drink)
Brinn: “Half of Antarctica is in my glass.”
Siarra: “Antarctica’s really small. Well, you know, all that global warming.”

Dad: “There are so many things I could be dreaming about right now.”
Brinn(?): “Like a White Christmas?”