(the Perkins edited an anthology)
Richards: “How are they putting this together?”
Student: “Probably intimately.”

(Joe walks in the room, Michelle is in a towell)
Joe: “Should I step out?”
Michelle: “Nah, I’m just printing.”
(Well, she was.)

Richards on masculinity: “[In the US] we have this rigid standard. Sorry.”
Class: *groan*
Richards: “It had to come.” *pause* “Haha.”
Class: *groan*

(overheard in the Nest)
Girl: “We’re on crack!”

Edmunds: “…My two favorite drugs, which are caffeine and alcohol.”

Edmunds: “Starbuck’s iced black coffee–it’s like crack; I swear there’s crack in it.”

Mother: (sung) “Interplanet Janet, she’s a–” (spoken) “What is she?”
Brinn: “BITCH.”

Johnathan: “When I scratch the back of my head–I mean my neck. It was a typo.”

Laura on toilets with water jets: “Ew, I don’t want water shot up my butt. That’s like anal sex with your toilet.”

Michelle on the thin walls in the dorm: “In this room, you can hear everything. You think you have secrets? I know them all.”

Siarra, who is a very angry driver and is waiting behind someone to turn: “What, you go when they come? Are you a prostitute?!”

(while leaving Wendy’s about a twisted Frosty)
Brinn: “What size did you get?”
Siarra: “It’s a twisted frosty. It only comes in one size: expensive.”